my thoughts were so loud I couldn't hear my mouth

I wish I could keep Nomad in my life forever. I wish my homelife would change. I wish I could move out. I wish I had a larger room so I could rearrange it more comfortably. I wish school would start because I can't wait to start learning again. I wish I had more friends right now. I wish my hair was long again. I wish I was an artist. I wish writing wasn't what I ended up being good at, I wish I was good at something I could enjoy. I wish I could break my addiction to Charles Bukowski books because I feel that if I did, I'd be happier. I wish I could buy an umbrella cockatoo, a new kitty, a new puppy, and have my own place to keep them all. I wish I could take all of my animals now and put them in my own place and get them away from this hell. I wish I knew how to tell people what I really thought all the time. I wish I knew how to customize my new blogspot. I wish I could handwrite as fast as I can type because I would rather write in a journal. I wish I didn't always work nights becuase I have more energy at night time and I would rather use that time to clean my room. I'm glad I got my license back today, and I'm glad everyone in DMV was nice to me. I wish my cat would stop throwing up. I wish all my animals were healthy. I wish I was healthy. I wish I could just live on my own little island, but more of a country, with all my animals living freely and I would sleep on a hammock outdoors instead of a bed stuffed in a house. I wish I could travel. I wish Hakan and Mehmet weren't going back to Turkey. I wish I could meet more Hakans and Mehemets. I hope I remember them forever. I hope Nomad stays with me at least until I'm in college because if he didn't I would be too depressed to even enroll in a school. I wish I was old and accomplished enough to have a baby because my baby would be my best friend but I'm not. I wish Katya and I didn't lose touch. I wish me and the rest of the world didn't lose touch. I wish I could be friends with everyone regardless of black and white but not everyone wishes the same thing so it doesn't always work out. I wish I had more people to talk to so I didn't have to talk to myself via internet. I wish I could go outside and run around but I'm not confident enough to run in front of the neighbors. I wish I could exercise more and play more and relax more but I only have time for work because I'm basically supporting myself. I wish someone understood me so that I didn't always sound like I was complaining but Matt always just says he's sorry. I wish Lauren and I stayed best friends forever and I wish I could move in with her right now. I wish I had the guts to post everything I want to say even though I know no one will probably be reading this.